Monday, December 6, 2010

Reverb 10

Hi!

I know. I’m blogging again. It’s been a looooooong time. But I’ve been busy adjusting to my new life and I didn’t really have anything to say. I mean I probably did but just couldn’t put it down. And I came across a link to Reverb 10 the other day and thought it was a perfect way to get back to blogging and to think about the past year and the year ahead. I’m starting a little late so I’m a bit behind in the prompts so I’ll try to catch up here.

But first I wanted to talk about the Shriners Hospital for Children. Do you know about it? I knew OF it but not all the great things they do or how they do it. I learned yesterday while I helped with the Christmas decorations. Shriners Hospital treats 3 things only: burns, spinal injuries and orthotics. They have 22 hospitals nationwide including Mexico & Canada. The hospital in Sacramento is the only one that has all three services under one roof and the only burn hospital on the west coast. They really do amazing things for these kids!!! The prosthetics department goes all out to make sure kids can continue the activities they love whether that is mountain biking or wearing heels to the prom. And these aren’t any ol’ prosthetics either. They can be covered in camo or leopard print of whatever the child’s desire. Did I mention this is all FREE to the parents? FREE!!! No bills are ever sent. It’s all funded by donations. This hospital alone has 4,000 volunteers so that’s important too. There is a school there because kids still need to learn. They even send a representative to the kids school to get all those little questions out of the way before the child goes back to his or her classroom. So it’s AMAZING! And if you know of any child with these issues you should recommend they go to the nearest hospital.

December 1 – One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?

I definitely think my word for 2010 was Change.  I choose that word for the obvious reason of changing my address from Kansas to California. But I also chose it because so MANY things in my life changed.  Who I am inside changed with this move. I put so many fears to rest like the big one of could I stay sober when I didn’t have Nana to take care of. WOULD I stay sober? And I did. I changed my home group, my friends, my sponsor. I had to change how I stayed sober.  My art has changed. I think I’ve only scrapped one page since I moved here but I have been making collages as gifts and am going to try to sell some.  My family has changed. While Nana is in the nursing home and still with us, she’s not part of my daily life. I have 2 families here. 3 really. The Lewis’s, Diaz’s & my AA family. I live in a house with teenage boys and dogs, and have Puerto Rican adoptive parents. Obviously my job changed but so did it’s duties. No longer responsible for Nana I’m back to being a hairstylist and there are changes there too.  Living with Nana I was always home and here my family sees me leave early and come home late. So many changes, but all totally worth the effort. I will admit that if I had begun to contemplate how difficult this move was going to be and all the changes I would endure I might not have proceeded, but I’m thankful I did.

Next year? I hope this time next year my word will be Adventures!  There are so many things I want to do and see. So many places to go, experiences to have.  I hope and pray that my career takes off and I’m able to build a steady clientele. I want to grow in my friendships and in my sobriety and spirituality. I hope my art leads to new ventures. Hopes and dreams are not short here!

December 2 – Writing. What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?

I’m not really a writer per se so this doesn’t really speak to me much, except for the part where I want to tell my story even if it’s just for myself. So I need to recommit to journaling or blogging and my art journaling.

December 3 – Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).

That moment for me is getting ready to drive away from Nana’s house. The U-Haul was packed to the limit. It was sweltering hot out: 108 degree’s that day I think. Kary and I were sweating. The cats where meowing from the back seat. I was trying to get Lily to give me a kiss goodbye, but she was mad because she knew I was leaving her. The house was empty except for some scattered stuff and things of Nana’s for Bob to pick up. 65 years it had been the Osborn’s home. 43 years of memories for me. My childhood. My life. My safe place to fall. I thought of all the times I’d set on the front porch swinging with Nana or Papa or all the evenings counting the big rigs that had missed there turn. Clover necklaces made and fireflies caught. The chirping locusts (which were chirping some then). Flooded with memories. And yet excited for the life that lead ahead. My new adventure. California or bust!

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December 4 – Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

WONDER? Oh yes, I wondered for sure! I wondered if I was making the right choice or if I made the right choice about daily for MONTHS!!! I also wondered all the way from Smallville, Kansas to State Capital, California (which locals say is just a large cowtown so I should fit right in right?)  Kary & I wandered the Rocky Mountains in search of the Royal Gorge train.  I wondered if I’d ever feel like myself again. I did LOTS of wondering this year.

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

I let go of a lot this year. My security blanket for one. It’s different being out in the world knowing you always have a soft place to fall and knowing you don’t.  No matter what happened in life I always knew I could go to Nana’s house and feel safe and secure so letting go of all that stability was a daunting and difficult task. I wasn’t just letting go of Nana, but of Papa, Mom and Alison. Family as I knew it. For while I was in that house and that house existed as a place I could spend time at, then I was connected to all of ‘them’ in a certain way. But now ‘home’ is filled with different people in a different place.  I let go of fears. I let go of expectations. I hung on to a few others. I’ve had to “let go & let God”.  And if we really admit it, all that so-called ‘control’ we think we have is false. God’s in control.  I have to practice letting go everyday.

December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

I’m currently working on several collages. I’m using canvas or canvas board, paper, vintage papers, inks, gel mediums, paint, masks, epherma, rub-ons, charcoal, oil paint sticks, stickers, glue, copper, beads, buttons. Whatever I can get my hands on really. I wish I had more time for this but during the week my life is really busy which doesn’t allow much crafty time. In fact, I think I’ll close this up for now and go work on my projects!

So that’s it for now. I’ll try to keep up daily with the prompts.  Hope you’re all having a Happy Holiday Season!!!

2 comments:

  1. Nice to see you again in blogland! Sweet memory with your Grandparents! I've been looking at those prompts but just rolling around in the brain - you did great!

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  2. I am crying like a baby!! This was beautiful. IT means so much to be a part of you for these brief moments when I read, listen, hear, watch, glimpse, or feel what you have experienced. I love you so!!

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